Turn Around
by DigiPuppy
Summary: This is my second fic but my first Taito and it's also a songfic. Taichi is going to college in the States. How does he handle this and can Yamato help.


  
Okay first of all I would like to thank everyone that reviewed my other story What About Me. You guys were great.  
  
Now on with this story, first of all I would like to apologize in advance. There are drugs in this story and I am pretty ignorant on the subject. If what happens medically is incorrect I am sorry just take it as part of the story.  
  
Warning this is a Taito!! Taichi and Yamato in a relationship. If your not into this then you may want to pass this story over. To everyone else enjoy. (One more thing, I made Koushiro a whole lot nicer in this fic. I figured he deserved it after what I did to him in the last. See I don't hate Koushiro just Kouyako *-*)  
  
Disclaimer..I don't own Digimon nor do I own the song Total eclipse of the heart. That's all that I should have to say.  
  
*************  
Turn Around  
*************  
  
  
Yamato walked through the park thinking about his life. Things just did not seem to be going his way, of course that was nothing new. It has been 3 weeks since graduation and Yamato life wasn't going anywhere. Yamato sat down on a bench near the lake and sighed. The band had broken up right after graduation all the other members were going off to college. Yamato had no idea that this was going to happen; he thought they were staying together for a while. Yamato didn't plan on going back to school yet he wanted to try and make it big. He didn't apply to a college and now it was to late. He wasn't sure what was going to happen now. He looked out over the water watching the sunset and thought to himself that was just like him. At one point and He had burned brightly like the sun and now his time was setting. The only thing though is he wasn't sure if he would ever rise again.  
  
His father had told him that since he wasn't going to school this year that he would have to find a job. Yamato's grades had been very good in school; he had graduated in the top 15 of his class. He told his father that he would be attending school the year after. Well community college here I come he thought.  
  
Yamato felt a tear slip down his face. Not because of the breakup of his band or his uncertain academic future, it was over something that happened at his bands breaking up party. They held a goodbye party for just the members and all the supporters. There were plenty of drinks for all and plenty of both fan girls and fan boys. Like Yamato most of the band members were bi-sexual. Though unlike the others Yamato did not sleep around, hell he usually hardly ever drank, but he was depressed that night and drank a little more than usual and was feeling pretty light headed about it.   
  
He was talking to Koushiro that night as he had been invited to the party as well as a thank you for all the technical stuff he had accomplished for them. They had gotten on the subject of love and Koushiro asked Yamato had he ever been in love. The beautiful blonde hardly ever dated and a lot of people had been curious as to why. Yamato thought about it for a while through the alcohol induced fog it was a little hard. Then he finally answered him.  
  
"Yeah Kou I have been in love and still am, the problem though is he doesn't love me back."  
  
"Really Yama, that's horrible. If you don't mind, may I ask who it is"?  
  
Normally Yamato would have said no and not because Koushiro didn't have the right to know, but because this was new to him also. He never realized that he was in love until now. He thought what the hell lets go for broke.  
  
"Promise you want tell Kou"  
  
"Of course Yama"  
  
"Taichi"  
  
"Wow, really?"  
  
"Yeah, fucked up isn't it."  
  
"Harsh" was all that he could say because some cute little brunette sat down on Yamato's lap and asked him if he would like to go somewhere private. Yamato pushed her off on to Koushiro who was very happy to take her off his hands and walked outside to the balcony for some air. He didn't see Koushiro the rest of the night.  
  
Now here he is still sitting at the bench thinking what in the world he was going to do about this. Yamato knew he never should have let himself fall in love with Taichi. He knew there is no way Tai would ever love him back. There was no chance in hell. Taichi was known as a ladies man; hell he has dated both Sora and Mimi. He even took Miyako out a couple of times. Yamato had never seen Taichi checking out any guys or displaying any interest in them what so ever. No Taichi was certainly not into guys.   
  
They graduated High school three weeks ago. The event was even sadder than the band breaking up. He knew so many things were going to change now. When he had walked across the stage the noise was deafening but surprisingly he could make out the cheers from Taichi as he whoop and hollered like know one's business. Of course Yamato was the same way with him. Since that day though he as not seen or heard from his best friend. He missed Taichi so much it hurt. What was worse was that Taichi was in America with his parents visiting the school his going to be attending. Taichi had gotten accepted to a university over there and was excited about going. Yamato was heartbroken. It had been hard on him. It seemed like the only thing he did now was cry, he slammed his fist down on the bench. He thought he heard something crack in his hand but he didn't care at that moment. He just felt so confused and he didn't know what he was going to do.   
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Turn around...  
Every now and then I get a little but lonely and you're never coming round  
Turn around...  
Every now and then I get a little bit tired of listening to the sound of my tears.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Maybe I should have told him when I had a chance he thought while holding his now sore hand. I should do it before he leaves. I have to let him know before he is gone, but what if I wasted my last chance. What if Taichi decides to stay and not come back this summer? This was tearing him up inside. Yamato had all this hurt and no one to talk to. Normally he would talk over his problems with Taichi, but this was something he had to bare alone. Yamato just hung his head down and let his tears fall.  
  
Meanwhile elsewhere in the park a spunky, wild hair boy was walking through the park. He had just gotten home from an exhausting trip and needed some peace and quiet. He wasn't sure about this whole college thing he was nervous as hell. He was also completely upset that he was going to have to leave behind his best friend, no scratch that, his love. Taichi had never truly been in love before and with a guy at that. But on his trip he realized just how much Yamato meant to him and the fact that they were going to be separated was taking it's toll on the feisty boy. Taichi then heard what seemed like someone crying. Always the one to help someone in distress searched for the source of the noise. He was in complete shock when he found out the source was his own beloved.  
  
Yamato was so distraught by this time that he did not hear the footsteps walk up to him or felt someone sit beside him on the bench. It wasn't till he felt someone put their hand on his shoulder that he jumped up only to be staring into the beautiful brown eyes that he adored. Taichi...  
  
What is he doing here Yamato thought? I thought he had at least another week to go, not that I am complaining. And then surprising both of them Yamato through his arms around the other boys neck, not caring at that moment what Taichi would think.  
  
To Yamato's surprise Taichi didn't pull away from him, instead he seemed to accept it with no problems.  
  
"Yamato, god please tell me what is wrong" Taichi said extremely worried.  
  
" I can't Tai, please understand I can't" Yamato sobbed.  
  
Taichi felt a little bit hurt at this.  
  
" Yama, you know that you can tell me anything, I will always listen."  
  
" I am sorry Tai not this time" Yamato said now pulling away from Taichi looking down at his sore hand.  
  
Taichi was now getting pretty upset with the stubborn blonde.   
  
"Damn it Yama I am not going anywhere until you tell me, what's the matter and I so swear to you that if I have to beat it out of you I will." Taichi was now also on the verge of crying himself.  
  
"Fine!! Do you really want to know!!! " Screamed Yamato " I am in love with you!! How do you like that huh!! Not only is your best friend gay but also he is in love with you!! Do you feel better now!!"  
  
Yamato didn't know why he said it but now that it was out he was scared to death of what Taichi would say. Taichi was taking his time sorting out all this information. After all it wasn't normal that the person you loved just screamed at you that he loved you too. Yamato was getting really upset that Taichi wasn't taking so long in speaking to him and he started to breath hard nearly hyperventilating. That was when Taichi grabbed Yamato's face and stared into his eyes. Clearly Yamato could not see disgust or hatred in those eyes all Yamato could see was the warmth and the spark that he loved so much. That's when Yamato knew that at least Taichi didn't despise him.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Turn around...  
Every now and then I get a little bit nervous that the best of the years have gone by  
Turn around...  
Every now and then I get a little bit terrified and then I see the look in your eyes  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
  
When Taichi didn't speak right away Yamato thought it would be best to give is friend room. So he got up and turned to leave him. Yamato just didn't know where to go from here and he couldn't take the silence. He knew he was on the edge of loosing it.  
  
No wait, thought Taichi, don't you dare turn away from me.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Turn around bright eyes  
Every now and then I fall apart  
Turn around bright eyes  
Every now and then I fall apart  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Yes I do Yama" Taichi said.  
"What?" Yamato spun around in confusion.  
"I do feel better, I can't tell you how much better." Taichi said getting up from the bench and walking over to him.  
Yamato couldn't look at him his mind was reeling. To much tension to much hope. He was afraid he was about to have his heart broken.  
  
When he felt Taichi's hand on his shoulder he said" I get it you feel better but... I know there is a but in there somewhere. Don't lie to me Taichi."  
  
Then Taichi did something that Yamato never would have guessed. He pulled him into a tight embrace and with his lips breathing into his ear he said." No buts Yama-chan, I feel better because I am in love with you too. I wish I had realized it sooner but I am so crazy about you that I can't stand it. I need you Yama I always have and always will."  
  
Taichi pulled back and looked at Yamato to study his face.  
  
"You need me?"  
  
Taichi nodded his head.  
  
"You love me"  
  
"No, I don't just love you Yama-chan I am so deeply in love with you that I don't think I will ever be the same again."  
  
Yamato then jumped about 3 feet in the air shouting out Yes!! He then grabbed a hold of Taichi and yelled out over the lake "HE LOVES ME!! DO YOU HEAR THAT !!! HE ACTUALLY LOVES ME!!!  
  
Taichi couldn't help but shake his head at his new love. He loved the boy more than anything in the world and now he was going to make sure that Yamato was happy. Only one problem though, college.  
  
Yamato seemed to remember at the same time about Taichi going to college. He had to do something about this. Taichi couldn't' leave him now.   
  
"Tai, let's run off together"  
  
"Eh?" Taichi said from deep in thought  
  
"Yeah I have always wanted to do something like see Europe or   
Australia. We could travel and just really live it up. No one else. But you and, we could backpack our way across the world and see the sites or...."  
  
Taichi was shaking his head.  
  
"I'm sorry Yama but I have to do this. I have to go, I have been working my whole life to get into a good university and I can't pass the chance up." Though Taichi would never admit it to Yamato how tempted he was to just give it all up for him.  
  
Even though Yamato's heart was broken, he knew Taichi loved him very much and he was right. He couldn't ask Taichi to give up on his dreams. But god did it hurt. Now that they found each other he was so scared that he was going to loose him. Yamato and Taichi sat back down on the bench where Yamato curled up in his arms. Keep me safe Tai please, if just for a little while, was all Yamato could think.   
  
Finally when Yamato stopped crying he whispered "Tai can you hold me for awhile"  
  
"Of course my Yama of course"  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Turn around...  
Every now and then I get a little bit restless and I dream of something wild  
Turn around...  
Every now and then I get a little but helpless and I'm like a child in your arms  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
After awhile Yamato's sobs quieted down his emotion changed. He was on an emotional roller coaster now because of everything that has happened. Right now he was feeling anger more than anything. He was angry with himself and Taichi for waiting to long. He was angry at life, Taichi's parents, at the university. It was something that came exploding out.  
  
" I understand Tai why you have to go but it is not fair. Why didn't we get more time with each other? Why is fate so cruel," this time his words came out a little bit more sharp.  
  
"Yama-chan I'm sorry, if I could change what was happening I would but I can't. I will write you I promise and we will still get to see each other every now and then. I have to come home sometime ya know."  
  
"Why didn't you say anything before now, I finally get to be with you only to have you leave. He screamed tears streaming down his face. He jumped up looking down at Taichi accusingly.   
  
" What would I say Yama, you were I mean are my best friend. I didn't say anything for the same reason that you didn't say anything."  
  
"Wrong Taichi the reason I didn't say anything was because I didn't think I stood a chance. I mean for goodness sakes everyone knows I am bisexual it isn't to hard to figure out. If I had even an inkling of an idea that you were I would have said something and you know that." Yamato dropped down to his knees crying his eyes out.  
  
Taichi reached out to hold him again and barley missed the swing to his face.  
  
"Don't touch me right now"  
  
"Yama" Taichi whispered  
  
Yamato looked up to the soft sound of his name being called. He looked into those deep soulful eyes that he loved so much and saw the love he felt reflected back at him with such compassion and intenseness.  
  
Then he let Taichi swoop him up to hold him close again.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Turn around...  
Every now and then I get a little bit angry and I know I've got to get out and cry  
Turn around...  
Every now and then I get a little bit terrified and then I see the look in your eyes  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
After a few more minutes Yamato noticed the time and new that he had to get going. Besides he just couldn't take it anymore more all the different emotions. He pulled away from his love "I'll call you later Taichi, I just can't talk anymore right now"  
  
"Yama, don't walk away please"  
  
"I'll call you later I promise"  
  
With that last statement Yamato took off for a run to his apartment. With the shout of "I love you my bright eyes!" echoing in the park.  
  
He opened up the door of his apartment and ran right into his room with barely acknowledging the fact his father hadn't come home yet. He threw himself on his bed and curled up in a ball. He was near hysterics all the emotions that he had built a wall against for the 6 years that they had known each other just came breaking out at once. He just needs some space to get things sorted out.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Turn around Bright eyes  
Every now and then I fall apart  
Turn around Bright eyes  
Every now and then I fall apart  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Sometime later Yamato woke up to a headache and pounding on the door. He looked at his clock and saw that it read 2 am. Who in the world would be knocking at his door at 2 in the morning?  
  
He ran to the door to stop the insistent pounding before it woke the neighbors up and opened it to a very weary and drained Taichi.  
  
"Tai?"  
  
"You didn't call" Taichi said hollowly  
  
"What?" Yamato was trying to make sense of this between the headache and the fact he was entirely awake yet it wasn't easy.  
  
"You told me you would call me, and you didn't." Taichi was starting to cry now.  
  
"Oh god I am so sorry Tai I guess I fell asleep"  
  
"Yama are you mad at me?"  
  
Yamato looked up to see Taichi was now sobbing. He wrapped his arms around him and dragged him inside. He closed the door with one hand without letting go of Tai. He then pinned him up against the door and kissed him hard on the mouth.  
  
"No, I am not mad at you he said a little breathlessly."  
  
"Good" was all Tai was able to get out because he seemed to forget how to breathe.  
  
Yamato quickly grabbed him and pulled him to his room. Taichi was a little bit confused and started to ask what was happening when Yamato said something that made him forget about anything but Yamato.   
  
" I need you Tai, please "  
  
"You don't even have to ask Yama" was all he could say before he crushed Yamato to him for another kiss. Then he started backing up Yamato until they reached his bed barely registering the fact they shut and locked the door behind them. When they reached his bed Taichi carefully laid Yamato down when he laid down halfway on top of him.   
  
"I love you Tai-chan"  
  
"I love you too Yama-chan"  
  
They both said breathlessly before Taichi grabbed Yamato's head and crushed his lips again. Yamato opened his mouth in surprise not expecting the kiss and Tai took advantage of it. He slipped in his tongue and started to explore his golden love's mouth. Yamato tasted better than he could ever imagine. Yamato groaned deeply into Taichi's throat as Tai's tongue worked over his lips and teeth.  
  
Yamato had thought this must be heaven. His Dark lover was sending his senses into overload. His taste was sure heavenly. Yamato couldn't help but claw a little at Taichi's back as he felt himself starting to lose control.  
  
Taichi then broke off the kiss to Yamato's disappointment, but before he could complain he felt Taichi's lips trail down his cheek to his neck. Yamato's nerve ending were on fire and he was moaning loudly now as Taichi started biting and kissing his neck.   
  
"Oh god Tai please don't stop."  
  
Taichi then went around to the front of his throat and started butting down the navy blue button up he had on. Every time he would open a button he would swirl his tongue where it had been. Every time he did that he would feel Yamato shiver and arch his hips just a little and Taichi knew that neither of them would be able to last much longer.   
  
It wasn't long until the new lovers were lying beside each other spent without any clothes on. Taichi was holding Yamato close as Yamato kept giving him little kisses on the neck.  
  
"What do you think our siblings will say when they find out"?   
Taichi asked giggling as Yamato reached a sensitive spot.  
  
"I think Takeru would be happy for me but I don't know about Hikari."  
  
"Oh I think she will be ok with it" he said with a smile.  
  
"And why is that"  
  
"Because when I came out to my parents last night that I was bi she came out that she was gay, and get this in love with Sora."  
  
"Sora? Wow and how did that go anyway"  
  
"They were pretty supportive needless to say I am still in shock about Sora and Hikari though.  
  
"Isn't that weird having your sister date your ex-girlfriend."?  
  
"Hehe very weird."  
  
"Well I guess that will make Takeru's choice for him then."  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"Well Takeru was having a hard time deciding who he loved more Hikari or Daisuke"  
  
"Hehe yeah I guess she made his decision for him"  
  
"Yeah I guess"  
  
"What is it about the Ishida brothers?"  
  
"About what"  
  
"That you guys have to have goggle wearing fools."  
  
"Your not a fool Tai and you know that"  
  
Suddenly Taichi frowned and said "I know I'm not a fool but what if I am one by going to America What if it doesn't work? What if you find someone else? What if..."  
  
"Shhhh"Yamato said putting a finger to his lovers lips." no more what ifs I want you to stop that okay. Really I just want you to hold me and lets get some sleep."  
  
"That sounds like a wonderful idea "Taichi said with a yawn.  
  
As Taichi fell asleep Yamato thought about what was going to happen and what has happened. He was completely in love with him but he was going away. If there were strong enough they may be able to make it through this period. One thing was for sure Yamato wasn't going to give up He finally had Taichi in his arms and together they had caused miracles before why couldn't they cause one more. Tai was his soul mate that Yamato was sure of.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
And I need you now tonight  
And I need you more than ever  
And if you only hold me tight  
We'll be holding on forever.  
And we will only be making it right  
Cause we'll never be wrong   
Together we can take it to the end of the line  
Your love is like a shadow on me all of the time  
I don't know what to do and I'm always in the dark   
Were living in a powder keg giving off sparks  
I really need you tonight  
Forever's going to start tonight  
Forever's going to start tonight  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Yamato woke the next day alone. He was suddenly worried that everything that had happed was a dream, until he smelled something burning. He ran into the kitchen with just a sheet wrapped around him to see flames shooting out of a skillet where and Taichi trying douse them.  
  
"Tai!! What are you doing??" Yamato said as he took the baking powder and dumped it in the skillet.  
  
"Oh yama hi" Taichi said sheepishly I was trying to make you breakfast in bed.  
  
"Tai do you even know how to cook?" remembering the days of camping and the digital world.  
  
"Well err" he said looking down.  
  
"It's a sweet gesture though," He said with a kiss to his nose.  
  
"Aw shucks geeze Yama" Taichi said in a goofy voice.  
  
" I tell you what you big goof ball, why don't you take a shower and I will clean up this mess and we will go out for breakfast ok?"  
  
"Sounds good but one thing?"  
  
"Oh? And what is that?"  
  
"I may need help washing my back," he said with a twinkle in his eye.  
  
Yamato turned around and looked at the mess and thought well that's not going anywhere and well Tai is so I guess it can wait.  
  
"Only if you wash mine" was all that Yamato said as he pulled a   
very happy Tai into the bathroom  
  
After breakfast Yamato gave Tai a kiss bye at his apt and headed home.   
  
A few months later Tai was packing to leave a broken hearted Yamato.   
  
"Tai isn't there anything we can do"  
  
"I'm sorry Yama-chan but I will see you at Christmas."  
  
"Christmas? But that is so far away" he said still trying to keep from crying.  
  
"Look between your knew job working in your dad's office and keeping an eye on both of siblings time will fly before you know it. And I expect you to take good care of Hikari while I'm gone" Taichi said with a kiss.  
  
Good ol'Taichi Yamato thought always trying to see the best into things. His optimism was one of the things Yamato loved most about him   
  
"Well you know if I don't then Sora sure will" Yamato said trying also to make it a lighter mood.  
  
Over the last few months the lovers didn't spend a day apart from each other and this was hard on both of them.  
  
With a quick kiss he got into his parents car and headed off to the airport. With a shout from Yamato as he raced after the car to call him as soon as he got there. Yamato then turned around and headed back to his apartment feeling like his whole world just fell apart.  
  
It wasn't long until Christmas and Yamato was so excited that really no one else could stand him. He had been working with his father helping out in the station. His father had let him have the job on one condition that he started school next fall. Yamato happily agreed. Now he had extra cash in hand and he knew exactly what he wanted to get Taichi. So with out little thought he went out and bought it. It was a painting he had commissioned of Wargreymon and Metalgurumon side by side in battle. Yamato was really looking forward to giving it to him. That was until Hikari called him.  
  
She told him that something came up and Taichi had called them to tell them that he wouldn't be able to make it in this year. This really surprised Yamato because Taichi hadn't called him. In fact it had been a few weeks since he had heard from him. Oh Yamato had tried to call him a couple of times himself but his roommate said that he was always out so Yamato just kept leaving messages. Yamato gave the present to Hikari and asked her to give it to him if she saw him any time soon.  
  
Christmas came and gone with no Taichi and a depression settled in with Yamato. It was probably the worse Christmas in his life since his parents divorce. Nobody could get him out of his room that day. Yamato realized that without Taichi there was nothing for him.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Once upon a time I was falling in love  
But now I am only falling apart  
There's nothing I can do   
A total eclipse of the heart  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
It was springtime now and Taichi would still call Yamato every now and then. The conversations were usually short and very impersonal. Yamato could feel Taichi pulling away from him and Yamato didn't know what to do.   
  
The latest phone call had really caught Yamato off guard. Taichi told him that he had gotten a job in America and that he wasn't coming home this summer.  
  
Yamato sat on his couch wrapped in a blanket crying remembering the conversation.  
  
"Do you hate me Taichi?" Yamato asked after Taichi broke the news to him.  
  
"No of course I don't you know that Yama."  
  
"Then why are you doing this"?  
  
"Yamato I thought if anyone you would understand why. I don't have to be around you for you to know how I feel. I will make it up to you one day but until then you will have to be patient." Taichi had actually gotten mad at him and was yelling at him.  
  
"No Taichi I don't understand and I don't know how much I can take of this."  
  
"Well then why don't you find someone to take your mind off of this for awhile over there"   
  
Yamato's heart sank. "Are you breaking up with me Taichi?"  
  
There was a pause before Taichi spoke. " I don't know Yama, I don't know."  
  
"Well call me when you know" Yamato screamed and hung up the phone on him. He was hurt, mad, confused and lonely. He didn't understand why Taichi was doing this to him. He just didn't know what he was going to do.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Once upon a time there was light in my life   
But now there's only love in the dark  
Nothing I can say  
A total eclipse of the heart  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
In the states though Taichi hadn't meant to say that to Yamato. He knew he still loved him and he really didn't want to lose him. I'm sorry Yama-chan he thought please don't be mad at me. Taichi looked up at the stars from the balcony and felt the tears coming to his eyes.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   
Turn around bright eyes  
Turn around bright eyes  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Taichi then wiped the tears from his eyes. He had problems of his own right then and he couldn't think of Yamato. He also knew that after this year Yamato couldn't and wouldn't want to be with him anymore. Taichi had no idea where his life was heading right now. The only thing he was sure of was that it was nowhere good.  
  
When Taichi had started school it hadn't really been that bad. Then as the work load picked up so did the stress and that was when he met Scott. Scott had been nothing like him, he hung out in a crowd that gave you the creeps just being near them. Soon he somehow he found himself part of that crowd and his problems went from bad to worse. Soon his grades started slipping from all of the partying that he was doing and he found his stress relief in something that he would have never thought of. Drugs. Major drugs, like cocaine and heroine. He was always an athlete in high school. He had gotten a soccer scholarship which how he was able to go to this school. Needless say that as soon as his grades dropped he was kicked off the team. This was not how he had planned his life he always thought he was stronger than this.  
  
The next week after the heart breaking call Yamato had received a surprising call from Hikari.  
  
"Yamato!"  
  
"Yeah that's me who is this?"  
  
"It's Hikari Yamato."  
  
"Hikari? What's up, anything wrong?? Yamato was feeling a little bit anxious and confused because Hikari hardly ever called him.  
  
"Yama I am worried about Tai?"  
  
"Why what's wrong?" Yamato could feel his stomach sinking.  
  
" I think he is mixed up in something in the states. The last time we spoke to him he wasn't Taichi. He is so different right now Yamato. I am so scared for him."  
  
Yamato knew that Hikari was extra sensitive to things that most people didn't understand especially when it came to Taichi. Yamato was having a hard time thinking now. Taichi!!  
  
"I know what you mean," He said when he finally found his voice he then explained what happened on Taichi's last call."  
  
Hikari was horrified, she knew full well how much her brother loved Yamato. Things were looked very bad indeed.  
  
"Yama we have to do something"  
  
"Hikari that's it I am going to go see him.  
  
"How?"  
  
"I saved enough money this summer that I have some left over for a plane ticket. I am going there to try to bring him to his senses if I have to kick his ass to do it."  
  
"Thank you Yama" Yamato could tell Hikari was crying now.  
  
"OK Kari give me the address on where he is staying and I will go check on him, I will give you call as soon as I find something out. Can you do me a favor Hikari?"  
  
"You want me to call the others and let them know right?"  
  
Yamato couldn't help but smile a little despite everything.  
"You got it kid"  
  
"Thanks again Yama and good luck"  
  
"Thanks somehow I think I am going to need it.  
  
Yamato then talked it over with his father about taking some time off from work to go. After he explained the reason why he was going he was surprisingly okay with it and wished him good luck.  
  
Yamato got his plane ticket for the next day and was soon on a plane to California where Taichi was attending school. When Yamato got to Taichi's dorm room the place was a racket. He knocked on his door and some half drunk half nude girl answered the door.  
  
"Yeah?" she slurred  
  
" Uh Hi I was looking for Taichi" Yamato was starting to feel sick to his stomach.  
  
"Isn't everyone these days" she said, "well come on"  
  
There was a major party going on in the room and some pretty rough looking people. Yamato saw some poor kid in a corner with ear plugs in attempting to study. Something about the kid reminded him a lot of Koushiro. Yamato just smiled, this must be Tai's roommate. But where was Taichi, that s when he heard a commotion.  
  
"HELL YEAH we did it!!!!!" Screamed a very familiar voice.  
  
Yamato looked up to see Taichi walk in with 3 very rough looking guys.  
  
"You have got to be kidding Tai?" Said the girl that had first let Yamato in.  
  
"No man you should have seen it, it was soooo cool?"  
  
Yamato was wondering what in the hell was happening and where in the hell was his normal Taichi. This guy looked strung out and wired in a bad way. He looked like he hadn't slept in weeks and was unusually thin for Taichi considering he normally had an athlete's body.   
  
"Man I can't believe we actually tossed the Coke machine out of the 23rd floor window, that was so cool." One guy said with every part of his body pierced.  
  
"Who the man? Who's the man?" Tai was whooping now.  
  
Yamato was in total shock. He couldn't believe what was going on.  
  
"Oh Tai some sweet looking guy is here to see you"  
  
"Dora you know not to let strangers into my dorm room who knows what he would find in here, he gave her a grin. Where is he?" I am going to kick her ass he thought if she let a nark in.  
  
"Sorry Taichi you know how I am with a cute face, he's over there."  
  
Tai looked over and almost fainted. There staring at him was his own beloved Yamato. No he thought to himself this is not good. He can't be here right now, I am so pumped up full of shit that I don't know whether I am coming or going and I have to face him right now. Ok Taichi maintain you can do it.  
  
Tai walked over to a very puzzled Yamato.  
  
"Yamato?"  
  
"Tai" Yamato said with a look of total confusion. He didn't make a move to embrace him, he could tell that Tai was full of some crap and he wasn't sure about the other people in the room.  
  
"Taichi my man who is this?" A very sleazy looking man walked up to them. He totally freaked Yamato out. You didn't have to have a gift like Taichi's sister to understand that this man was major bad news.  
  
"Oh hi Scott, this is a friend of mine"  
  
"Well aren't you going to introduce me after all a friend of your most certainly can be a friend of mine."  
  
"No I don't think Yama wants to be your friend right now, he just got here" Taichi said getting in front of Yamato.  
  
Warning bells were starting to go off in Yamato's head.  
  
"What you think this guy is too good to be my friend"  
  
"Uh no of course not Scott" You could tell that Taichi was nervous about something and then it hit him. Yamato had thought Taichi had been sleeping with this guy but no of course he wasn't. This guy was one major dealer. Yamato after all used to belong to a band and knew exactly what kind of people they were. And this guy was bad news, No way around it. God what had Taichi gotten himself into.   
  
Yamato grabbed a hold of Taichi and pulled him out of the room without so much as a word. He could distinctly hear the girl named Dora ask them if they wanted her to join them, Yamato just ignored her as he rushed Taichi outside.   
  
He took a very high Taichi to the nearest bench and sat him down. As soon as they sat down Tai threw his arms around Yamato crying his eyes out. He had missed the blonde so much and now he was here. He knew somehow Yamato would make it better, he always did.  
  
"What happened Tai?" Yama said a little scared about the way things are going.  
  
Taichi sniffled and then looked up. " I am a failure Yamato. I haven't told my parents that they have wasted $30,000 on me. I have flunked out Yama I am on Academic suspension. I lost my scholarship and I am so messed up in the head. This is not how my life was supposed to turn out." He was crying hard now.  
  
"Tai-chan...Sssshhhh"  
  
"And I was so lonely Yama, I missed you more than I can ever say. I am so weak Yama I couldn't handle the stress, I hate myself for what I have become. I don't even have the right to be seen with you Yamato." Taichi was crying harder now, breaking Yamato's heart.  
  
"Sshhh, Tai listen...shhhhh" Yamato said trying to calm him down, " I have got a hotel room here let me take you back there and then in the morning we can talk about this more. I don't want you going back to your room tonight with those people in there ok?"  
  
Taichi just shook his head yes and Yamato helped him to his feet and called a taxi to take them to the hotel. When they got there Yamato was able to get Taichi into bed before he passed out on him. Yamato curled up on a chair in the room watching him sleep a very disturbed sleep. I should have been there for him, Yamato thought. He has had to do this on his own with no one to help him. I'm sorry my beloved I let you down was Yamato's last thought before he slipped into a light sleep of his own with tears still running down his face.  
  
The next morning Yamato was woken up to the sound of someone puking in the bathroom. It took only a couple of seconds until he remembered what happened. Yamato watched as Taichi wearily made it out of the bathroom back on to the bed. Taichi tried to give him a weak smile and a hello but the nausea took back over and he ran back to the bathroom. Yamato followed Taichi into the bathroom and held back the bushy brown hair of his until it was over.  
  
He then helped a very shaky Taichi to bed and got a cold damp cloth. He sat down next Taichi and placed the cloth on his head, the proceeded to pull a very willing Taichi into his arms who was clinging to him like his life depended on him.  
  
"Are you willing to let me help you my love?" Yamato whispered to the still shaking and sweating Taichi.  
  
"Do you still want to?" Taichi said.  
  
"Of course I do, don't ask suck stilly questions" Yamato said leaning down to kiss to his forehead.  
  
"Then yes Yama-chan, please, I need you" Taichi said crying again.  
  
"Do you trust me?" He asked wiping the tears from his eyes.  
  
"Yes" He sniffled  
  
"Good here is the plan. I am taking you back to Japan."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Tai you have to go back home and get cleaned up, I will help you with that."  
  
Tai just hung his head down all of his hopes about school he saw go down the toilet this morning. "So that's it huh I'm a failure"  
  
Yamato thumped him in the head" Nonsense"  
  
"Ouch watch it"  
  
"No listen to me I will take you back home and I will help you get clean, then we will start over. I am starting the community college in the fall and I want you to start with me. We will make it through school together. After two years you can transfer wherever and we will forget about this heinous trip."  
  
Tai just looked up at him with love and tears in his eyes. "Thank you" was all he could manage to say.  
  
"Tai do you understand how great you are. What you do to me what I know about you. I am so sorry that I wasn't here for you when you needed me?"  
  
Suddenly Taichi sat up. " Oh god Yamato I am so sorry about that phone call I never...."  
  
"Ssshhhhh love, it's over."  
  
"But how can you still want me."  
  
"Shhhhh, like I haven't had my problems in the past. You were there for me then how could I judge you now."   
  
With that said Taichi yawned for a moment and curled up against the warmth of his boyfriend and fell fast asleep.   
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Turn around...  
Every now and then I know you'll never be the boy you always wanted to be  
Turn around...  
Every now and then I know you'll always be the only boy who wanted me the way that I am  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Later that morning Yamato called Hikari like he had promised and after okaying it with Taichi he told her everything that had happened. Then Tai's mom got on the phone and wanted to speak to Tai, he was scared to death about what his parents were going to say. He was extremely surprised when his mother was very supportive of him and just wanted him to come home.   
  
The problem was they didn't have enough money to get Taichi home so his mom called the airline and bought his ticket home for him. She also lectured him that she would have done this at any time for him to come home and on how her and his father will always be there for him no matter what.   
  
Taichi was feeling a little bit better and told Yamato that he had better get a shower he was sure he smelled awful.  
  
"But I may need help washing my back" He said grinning at Yamato.  
  
Yamato turned around and looked at the clock, well they had enough time before check out....  
  
"Only if you wash mine," He said pushing Taichi into the bathroom.  
  
Later after the shower they were getting ready to check out and Taichi was watching how efficient Yamato was in getting things together. All those years on the road with his band must have taught him a few things about coming and going he thought.   
  
"What about your stuff in your room?" Yamato asked as he was packing his suitcase.  
  
"We will just leave it I don't want to go back there. Those guys usually hang out there and Scott is going to be pissed that I blew him off last night. I really don't want to face that. I still have stuff at home and I just want to go now."  
  
"Ok got ya," Yamato said zipping up his suitcase.  
  
They checked out of the hotel and called a taxi for the airport. Taichi had been pretty quiet during the ride and in the airport. It wasn't until he got on the plane that he spoke.  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Why what?" Yamato asked.  
  
"Why are you, Kari and my parents being so understanding about this."?  
  
"Because its you Taichi"  
  
"Huh"  
  
Yamato laughed."Tai do you realize how special you are to us. You have always been there for every one of us and we have all looked up to you one way or another. It wasn't coincidence that you became leader ya know. It was your heart and everything about you. I'm not the only one that loves you ya know." Taichi looked at him shock.  
  
"They all love you Tai, maybe not in the same way I do, but they all love you. You are what makes us complete. You bring energy and focus to the group. We have all missed you."   
  
"Yama..."  
  
"Yes Tai" sighed Yamato  
  
"Thank you, I haven't been the best boyfriend in the world but you still came after me."  
  
Yamato grabs Taichi's hand. " And I would do it again even if I had to fight a hundred Scotts to get you out of there. Taichi smiled weakly and leaned his head on Yamato's shoulder and went to sleep for the long flight.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Turn around...  
Every now and then I know there's no one in the universe as magical and wondrous as you  
Turn around...  
Every now and then I know there's nothing any better and there's nothing I just wouldn't do  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
When they got off the plane all 10 other digidestine plus Tai's mom and dad greeted them. Tai couldn't believe it when he heard them clapping and whistling when he came off the plane. Kari flew straight into his arms crying her eyes out.  
  
" I am so glad you are home big brother" was all she could say.  
  
Everyone noticed the same things about Taichi that Yamato noticed but they knew with him being home that Taichi will be all right. Everything was going to be okay now they thought.  
  
But fate had other plans..  
  
Taichi had been hooked on some major drugs for a very long time and his system was unstable. He was hospitalized as soon as he got home to decide exactly how much damage had been done. Yamato had gone with them to check him in and noticed Taichi was shaking and sweating hard. The withdrawals were not going to be easy on him he thought. That was the understatement of the year.  
  
  
5 days later after Taichi was checked in Yamato was going in for a visit. Well actually attempt to visit. Taichi hadn't been allowed to have visitors yet and everyday Yamato stopped in to see if he could see him yet. He was going nuts to see Taichi and to hear his voice. He missed him so much but he also knew they would not be apart again. He couldn't wait to begin college with him this year. As he was stepping out the door the telephone rang. He almost ignored it but decided it may have something to do with his visit today so he went ahead and answered it.  
  
It was the call that changed his life forever.  
  
  
"Hello?"  
  
"Yamato?" A crying Hikari on the other end.  
  
"Kari what's wrong?" Yamato all of a sudden felt cold.  
  
"It's Tai Yama, he's gone into a coma. They say there was already so much damage done that the withdrawals were just too much for him. Yama they said his system is shutting down and they can't do anything about it. They say he is going to die and it may only take a matter of days or even hours." Hikari was bawling now, but Yamato couldn't say anything.  
  
Tai was dying and there was nothing that he could do. He felt the panic and the guilt rise in him. He had been too late, Tai couldn't die. They had to many plans together.   
  
"Yama? Yama? You still there?  
  
Yamato blinked he forgot about Hikari on the phone.  
  
" I'm coming now Kari"  
  
"Ok Yama hurry"  
  
Yamato grabbed his coat and ran out of his apartment to his car in 15 minutes he was there. He walked into Taichi's room to see Hikari asleep next to her brother with Sora standing behind her with her hands on her shoulders. His parents surrounded Taichi holding his hand. When they saw me come on they nodded to each other and to Sora as they left for a few minutes to give me some time alone with him. Yamato told them not to wake Hikari, as she probably needed the sleep.  
  
He walked over to Taichi's still form and picked up his hand. Yamato looked around at all the machines that he was hooked up on and kissed him on the cheek. Everything was so surreal it couldn't be happening, he couldn't be dying. Not now, not when they were so close.  
  
Yamato leaned in close to Taichi and whispered, "I love you" to him softly.  
  
Just then an alarm started going off and doctors came storming into the room. Hikari woke up immediately and tried to get to his side. His parents and Sora had come running back into the room and Sora was holding Hikari back so she wouldn't get in the way. Yamato just stood there in shock then for some reason he walked over to the girls and wrapped both of his arms around them. Yamato couldn't be much more comfort than that though as he was crying so hard himself. They watched in horror the doctors tried revive Taichi. Yamato looked up and saw his parents standing in the doorway holding on to each other crying.   
  
The commotion stopped and Yamato looked over to the doctor who looked at Yamato and the girls then to Tai's parents" I'm sorry " he said. And they covered him up with a sheet. Yamato and Sora felt Hikari go heavy and he knew she had fainted. Yamato didn't know how he and Sora held her up like they did. He was in shock himself he just stood there staring at the sheet feeling the tears stream down his face. The doctor was trying to usher everyone out and Yamato asked if he could just have two seconds alone in here. The doctor looked at Taichi's parents who nodded and helped Sora take out a very pale Hikari. Yamato smiled down at his love and touched his hand underneath the sheet. It was still warm and a few teardrops fell. He then turned to leave and as he left he thought he heard something. It may have been his imagination but he thought he could hear Taichi's voice whisper for just a second " I love you too bright eyes".  
  
Yamato was never the same after that all he spent the majority of the days either in shock or grief. The day of the funeral Dai and Jyou had to hold him back from jumping into the grave with him.   
  
It was raining that day, a day Yamato would never forget as long as he lived. All of the Digidestine had been there. Hikari, Sora and him were huddled up together trying to find comfort from one another. When they lowered the casket into the hole it was too much for Yamato and something inside of him snapped. He screamed out NO and ran towards the hole. The next thing he knew he was being grabbed by Jyou and Daisuke and thats when he fainted. Yamato didn't remember anything after that except for waking up in his own bed.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Turn around Bright eyes  
Every now and then I fall apart  
Turn around Bright eyes  
Every now and then I fall apart  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
2 months have gone by and Yamato was sitting on his bed remembering the nights that he and Taichi spent together. Before Tai had left for college he was the one who would always console Yamato by holding him through the night. But Taichi wasn't here anymore and Yamato had never felt lonelier. He knew there was going to rescue him this time.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
And I need you now tonight  
And I need you more than ever  
And if you only hold me tight  
We'll be holding on forever  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
They were soul mates after all, and they needed to be together. One couldn't live without the other. That he knew for sure. He also missed Taichi so much that it was coming to the point that he didn't even take time to get up out of bed in the morning. Sure everyone was worried about him and came to visit him, but none of them had been able to reach past the depression.  
  
He was sitting in his bed one morning looking out the window at the sun rising. Again he didn't sleep last night. There was just no life without Taichi, none. That was when he made up his mind that he wouldn't be without him anymore. He couldn't be without him anymore.  
  
"Wait for me Tai I'm coming, this time I won't take so long in getting to you" Yamato whispered to the air.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
And we will only be making it right  
Cause we'll never be wrong   
Together we can take it to the end of the line  
Your love is like a shadow on me all of the time  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Yamato went into the bathroom after writing a little note to his father as he ran a very nice warm bath. He didn't bother bringing in a towel or a change of clothes; he knew he wouldn't need it. He grabbed the razor blade from the cabinet and slowly got undressed remembering everywhere that Taichi had touched. He then crept into the warm water and sunk down into until the water was up to his chest.   
  
He was so engrossed in the memories that he and Taichi had shared that he barely felt it when the blade cut into both wrists. He then lowered both of his now bleeding wrists the warm water. He hissed as the water stung a bit but he knew the water would help keep the blood flowing.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
I don't know what to do and I'm always in the dark   
Were living in a powder keg giving off sparks  
I really need you tonight  
Forever's going to start tonight  
Forever's going to start tonight  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Yamato could feel the warmth wash over him as the water was turning red. He could almost imagine Tai as an angel waiting for him to wrap his wings around him. His vision was blurring a little and he found it hard to keep his head up he was about to go unconscious when he thought he heard Taichi's voice call out to him." I'm waiting my love, I'm waiting." Then all went black and Yamato Ishida went limp as his pulse died out and his soul went to be reunited with its mate for all time.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Once upon a time I was falling in love  
But now I am only falling apart  
There's nothing I can do   
A total eclipse of the heart  
Once upon a time there was light in my life   
But now there's only love in the dark  
Nothing I can say  
A total eclipse of the heart  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
The End  
  
I am so sorry for writing such a long story but I couldn't find a place to stop. I also am now crying myself, how cold I write such a thing. Well anyway I hope you enjoyed this and until next time.  



End file.
